gold star
also titled “where in I pat myself on the back for my mothering skills”.
It all began with a conversation about stealing. My (just shy of 9 year old) son asked me why people steal. I turned it around and asked him why he had stolen batteries off the floor of the Goodwill (really who would care that he took lose batteries off the floor? But, you take what you can and turn it into teaching moments, right?) His response, “because I wanted them…but I gave them back.” (only after I found them stuffed in his pocket and made him march them back in the store)
We talked about how people steal because they don’t want to work and EARN things- they just take. Then he asked me when I was going to buy him a recorder. Guilty of handing my kids life-on-a-platter I had already bought him the silly piece of plastic for $4 from Old Navy, but hadn’t told him yet. LIGHTBULB!
I decided to make him EARN the money for the silly instrument, because sucking your parents blind is akin to stealing no? I told him I would pay him $2 for mowing the lawn (least you think I am totally cheap, our lawn is probably 6ft by 15ft) and he could give me $2 of his own money and then I would get him the recorder.
I love the sight of my child working hard, and I only feel a little bad that he is allergic to grass and we still made him do this. This is his first time ever mowing the lawn- so I had to document it, as it won’t be the last.
Did I mention that I also taught the boy to do his own laundry (sort it and EVERYTHING?!)? All I got to say is one down, two more to go! Once I get all the kids doing their own laundry maybe I’ll start doing Aaron’s again (don’t hold your breath sweetie).
What about you, do you make your kids work for what they want? Do they do regular chores? Do they get an allowance? Tell me, tell me!!
April 7th, 2011 at 10:21 pm
Good job! You do deserve a gold star.
I try not to give my kids everything they want but it is harder than it sounds especially when the things they want aren’t very expensive -like the $4 recorder. I have my boys help set the table for dinner and clear the table and they almost always clear their plates and cups without reminding every time they eat. If I am cleaning bathrooms and the big boys are home and I don’t need them to “babysit” they help but I need to get better about them having their own chores. No allowance either.
April 8th, 2011 at 1:42 pm
YAY! I’m a huge fan of kids earning stuff for themselves. I think they take better care of it once it’s theirs when they have to work for it. Good job Mama!
At our house, parents provide necessities, birthday/Christmas gifts and the chance to earn money for everything else. No allowance, but I think I pay too much for their chores, so it all works out ok. Currently Edie is saving for a hamster and all its gear, $58 by her calculations. I hope it takes a long time and maybe between now and then she’ll realize she doesn’t really want the stinky little thing after all. (crossing my fingers!)
April 8th, 2011 at 3:25 pm
Hi, have heard of you via Amy. Yip, I’m all for having kids earn their way. Our eldest daughter lost her entire, brand new, named PE kit recently and we made her pay for half the cost of replacing it. She never forgets where she leaves it now! Hard to go through with it, and I was in tears afterwards but it had the desired effect. Chores = allowance here, but a percentage of that has to go to charity each month. We’re tough, but our girls are 11 & 14 and know their parents don’t get money for nothing, so they don’t either!
April 9th, 2011 at 12:33 pm
I think it is wonderful. Particularly, with young men. So many boys are just allowed to slide by doing the ‘boy’ things around their homes and when they go to college or on missions they are unable to even do their laundry or brown meat. Good for you!
My oldest is only 7 but even still his weekly jobs are taking care of his cat entirely on his own (I am very allergic and can’t, so he had to agree to do so to get it), emptying the dishwasher, folding his own laundry, and helping put his borthers to bed while his daddy is gone. Many days he even packs his own lunch, so I just have to check it. My five year old has similar tasks, but even at five he can fold and put away all his clean laundry. It is a service to our children to teach them to be responsible young, and I think you are doing an excellent job.
April 16th, 2011 at 9:30 am
We do a weekly allowance, 1/2 their age. So, Cailin gets $4.50 and Avrie gets $3.00.
They have set chores that they do every week, Cailin does a little more than Avrie. But they also have to do basically anything I ask them to do, that is part of earning the allowance.
The set chores, unloading the dishwasher together (I cant tell you the last time I unloaded a dishwasher, its all them, and sometimes its 2x a day), put their clean clothes away (I fold them because Im anal like that), pick up the house every night before bed.
And because we are in a 1 bedroom condo right now and they sleep in the living room they have to make up their beds on the couch every night and fold and put their beds away every morning, its actually quite a chore.
What else do they do? Hmmmm, right now Im limited because of the small space we live in but they do whatever I ask them to do, and once the baby is born Im sure there will be multiple things added to that list.