(this is a repost of a piece I wrote last year, mother’s day seemed like a good time to post it again. Hope all you amazing women out there get a nap today and a pat on the back for all you do!)

(my friend Karin and me, admiring her new baby)
I’m a sought after demographic ( I think). I’m female, white, 18-35, college educated and living in a middle class tax bracket. Yet, I am never accurately represented in Media today. I think I know why…
My house is not large and spacious. I have 5 people in 1200sq feet. My house does NOT reflect the latest Pottery Barn catalog or the retro mid century modern style. I have piles in every room of my house. Piles of books, toys, fabric, clean laundry, notifications from school & dental reminder cards. My bathroom sink has minty blue toothpaste spread across the counter. As I write this my dining room (which also doubles as a home office) floor has bits of spaghetti on it. I’m waiting until it dries so I can sweep it up, which is easier than picking up the sticky piece by hand.
Most of my days start with vim & vigor (at least after I’ve had an hour or so to reacquaint myself with the sun), but by 10am I’ve run out of steam, and not the “I-could-sleep-anywhere” kind of exhausted (although there are those days too). But the I’m so tired of breaking up petty fights about who looked at whom funny & protecting the baby from her overly “loving” older siblings.
That’s right, I don’ t have a nanny or a housekeeper; I stay at home with my kids while my husband works a 12 hour work day. You might look at this and think, “oh what a luxury!” I see it more as a sacrifice. We live a very meager life style to make this work. I sacrifice a career, regular manicures, dinners out, a larger home, intellectual conversation, the ability to use the bathroom uninterrupted, vacations to Disney-world and that ipad I so very much want.
My kids don’t smile all the time, their clothes don’t always match (mostly because they are exerting their independence). Their struggles cannot be solved in 30min. They fight. Despite what we teach them, they do not always (or even frequently) use their manners. They challenge me every single day, I am constantly thinking of their futures and second guessing every choice I make regarding them.
I don’t own the latest technological gadget (we bought our first apple i-product in 201l). Every “extra” (and I use that term loosely) bit of money we can scrape together is spent at Sonic, for Happy Hour Dr. Pepper’s (which should be called, Mom’s Sanity Hour) or on new shoes for the kids-that they seem to outgrow within an hour of purchasing. We don’t take vacations, unless you consider the 6 hour drive (that always takes 7, but feels like 9) to Grandma & Grandpa’s house where we work twice as hard to keep the kids in line as we would if we’d stayed home.
It is true though, that despite 3 pregnancies and almost 14 years I have only gained 5 lbs since my wedding. But I tell you, it’s only a number on a scale, because NOTHING looks like it did 14 years ago. Age, pregnancy and nursing are great for restructuring your body. I recently learned firsthand what the phrase “muffin top” meant.
While my life does not match any modern media representation of motherhood I wouldn’t give this up for all the gold in California. I chose this life, on purpose. My husband is my best friend and my children are 3 of the best decisions I have ever made. I made conscious choices along the road of life to lead me here. This is where I want to be.